{"id":377933,"date":"2015-06-09T09:15:28","date_gmt":"2015-06-09T06:15:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/?p=377933"},"modified":"2015-06-09T09:15:28","modified_gmt":"2015-06-09T06:15:28","slug":"nglish-joks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/nglish-joks\/","title":{"rendered":"Nglish joks"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, “We aren’t in, leave a message.” That’s why I’ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me
\n\u062a\u0639\u0631\u0641\u0648 \u0625\u064a\u0634 \u0623\u0643\u0631\u0647 \u0641\u064a \u0627\u0644\u0631\u062f \u0627\u0644\u0622\u0644\u064a \u0625\u0646 \u0627\u0644\u0646\u0627\u0633 \u062a\u0633\u062a\u0645\u0631 \u062a\u062d\u0643\u064a \u0648\u062a\u0636\u064a\u0639 \u0648\u0642\u062a\u0643 \u0623\u0642\u0635\u062f \u0643\u0644 \u0625\u0644\u0644\u064a \u064a\u062d\u062a\u0627\u062c\u0648\u0627 \u064a\u0642\u0648\u0644\u0648 (\u0625\u062d\u0646\u0627 \u0645\u0648 \u0645\u0648\u062c\u0648\u062f\u064a\u0646 \u0625\u062a\u0631\u0643 \u0631\u0633\u0627\u0644\u0647) \u0642\u0631\u0631\u062a \u0623\u062e\u0644\u064a \u0627\u0644\u0631\u062f \u0627\u0644\u0622\u0644\u064a \u062a\u0628\u0639\u064a \u0623\u0628\u0633\u0637 \u0648\u0623\u0642\u0635\u0631 (\u0623\u0639\u062f\u0643\u0645 \u064a\u0627 \u0645\u062a\u0635\u0644\u064a\u0646 \u0625\u0646\u0643\u0645 \u0645\u0639\u062f \u0631\u0627\u062d \u062a\u0639\u0627\u0646\u0648 \u0645\u0646 \u062e\u0644\u0627\u0644 \u0631\u062f \u0623\u0644\u064a \u0637\u0648\u064a\u0644 \u0639\u0646\u062f\u0645\u0627 \u062a\u062a\u0635\u0644\u0648 \u0628\u064a )
\nAn old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: “I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?”
\nPatient: “Well, give me the bad news first.”
\nDoctor: “You have cancer, I estimate that you have about two years left
\nPatient: “OH NO! That’s awefull! In two years my life will be over! What kind of good news could you probably tell me, after this???”
\nDoctor: “You also have Alzheimer’s. In about three months you are going to forget everything I told you.
\n\u0631\u0627\u062d \u0631\u062c\u0644 \u0639\u062c\u0648\u0632 \u0644\u0644\u062f\u0643\u062a\u0648\u0631 \u0648\u0628\u0639\u062f \u0645\u0627 \u0639\u0645\u0644 \u0627\u0644\u0641\u062d\u0648\u0635 \u0642\u0627\u0644\u0647 \u0627\u0644\u062f\u0643\u062a\u0648\u0631 \u0639\u0646\u062f\u064a \u0644\u0643 \u062e\u0628\u0631\u064a\u0646 \u0648\u0627\u062d\u062f \u062d\u0644\u0648 \u0648\u0648\u0627\u062d\u062f \u0645\u0648 \u062d\u0644\u0648 \u0625\u064a\u0634 \u062a\u0628\u063a\u0649 \u0623\u0648\u0644 \u0627\u0644\u062d\u0644\u0648 \u0648\u0644\u0627 \u0627\u0644\u0645\u0648\u062d\u0644\u0648 \u0631\u062f \u0627\u0644\u0639\u062c\u0648\u0632 \u0642\u0648\u0644\u064a \u0627\u0644\u0645\u0648 \u062d\u0644\u0648 \u0623\u0648\u0644 \u0642\u0627\u0644\u0647 \u0627\u0644\u062f\u0643\u062a\u0648\u0631\u0648 \u0639\u0646\u062f\u0643 \u0633\u0631\u0637\u0627\u0646 \u0648\u0623\u062a\u0648\u0642\u0639\u0644\u0643 \u062a\u0639\u064a\u0634 \u0633\u0646\u062a\u064a\u0646 \u0631\u062f \u0627\u0644\u0639\u062c\u0648\u0632 \u0644\u0627\u0643\u062b\u064a\u0631 \u0633\u0646\u062a\u064a\u0646 \u062d\u064a\u0627\u062a\u064a \u062d\u062a\u0646\u062a\u0647\u064a \u0625\u064a\u0634 \u0646\u0648\u0639 \u0627\u0644\u062e\u0628\u0631 \u0625\u0644\u0644\u064a \u0645\u0645\u0643\u0646 \u062a\u0642\u0648\u0644\u0647 \u0643\u0645\u0627\u0646 \u0631\u062f \u0627\u0644\u062f\u0643\u062a\u0648\u0631 \u0625\u0646\u062a \u0643\u0645\u0627\u0646 \u0639\u0646\u062f\u0643 \u0632\u0647\u0627\u064a\u0645\u0631 \u0648\u0628\u0639\u062f 3 \u0634\u0647\u0648\u0631 \u062d\u062a\u0646\u0633\u0649 \u0643\u0644 \u0643\u0644\u0645\u0647 \u0642\u0644\u062a\u0647\u0627
\n” The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?”
\n“Why?”
\n“Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”
\n\u0636\u064a\u0639 \u0631\u062c\u0627\u0644 \u0632\u0648\u062c\u062a\u0647 \u0642\u0631\u0628 \u0645\u0646 \u0648\u062c\u062f\u0647 \u062d\u0644\u0648\u0647 \u0641\u064a \u0633\u0648\u0628\u0631\u0645\u0627\u0631\u0643\u062a \u0642\u0627\u0644\u0647\u0627 \u0645\u0645\u0643\u0646 \u062a\u0643\u0644\u0645\u064a\u0646\u064a \u062f\u0642\u0627\u064a\u0642 \u0642\u0627\u0644\u062a\u0644\u0647 \u0644\u064a\u0647 \u0642\u0627\u0644\u0647\u0627 \u0644\u0623\u0646 \u0643\u0644 \u0645\u0631\u0647 \u0623\u062d\u0643\u064a \u0641\u064a\u0647\u0627\u0645\u0639 \u0648\u062d\u062f\u0647 \u062d\u0644\u0648\u0647 \u062a\u0637\u0644\u0639 \u0632\u0648\u062c\u062a\u064a \u0641\u064a \u0648\u062c\u0647\u064a
\n LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
\u2757 <\/font><\/b><\/b>\n <\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, “We aren’t in, leave a message.” That’s why I’ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1159,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[71],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-377933","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","","category-71"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/377933","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1159"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=377933"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/377933\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=377933"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=377933"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.satfrequencies.com\/girls\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=377933"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}